Here I am.. thinking...
Yeah, a dangerous thing.
I have to wonder.. what did i do?
I know.. I am not the same as others..
I am unique to some..average to others.. invisible to most.
So.. what did I do.??
Am I to ..me?
Do you feel the same as the rest.. too good to be true.. not good enough?
I have been there all my life..
I qualify as the perfect rebound guy.. the escape.. the better than the last..but never good enough..or..maybe too good for you.. and your sister and best friend.. you would rather choose the druggie..the convict..the cheater.the beater...the loser over me.. the wrong wrong guy over me.. I am too good to be hurt..yet I am always hurt.. again and again.
I cannot compete with some.. anymore.. but I am me.
If you have taken the time to know me on different levels.. you may know me as much as I know you.
I always care deeply ..completely..
I did for 17 years..going absolut-ly.. no where..
But I did.. I can..I would..even more for one that would appreciate it..
Yet..I aways find myself.. in this place..
Wondering what I could have or should have..done..
Why am I still alone..because.. I cannot convince.. the worthy one of my intention.. so..I lament...
I am not worthy.. I am not worthy.....
.. been there too many times..
I just do not know why... or how to make it worth all the effort.
Yeah..I can ignite.. I can make the magic fire..
But I am not worthy..I guess..
You know..I am not made of glass..I wont shatter if you drop me..
I crack.. I bruise..
But history shows I don't break.. I never give up.
Sometimes I give in.. but never up..
How long have you known me?.
How much have I been through, that you have seen... am I a ghost??
Did I disappear when it got difficult?
Why do I have to beg to be in your life?.
Yes...it's the beer talking.. I won't remember this.. I will be afraid to say to you.. but.. you already know this. And yet you still push me away... or limit your contact... hoping I will go away.. so I won't make an issue.. .
Is it really an issue.??
Ok.. I need to stop..
Beer..
I wont censor this as I did the last.. there will not be a gap
Filled with ...
I will just end..
R 9/19/17
Yeah, a dangerous thing.
I have to wonder.. what did i do?
I know.. I am not the same as others..
I am unique to some..average to others.. invisible to most.
So.. what did I do.??
Am I to ..me?
Do you feel the same as the rest.. too good to be true.. not good enough?
I have been there all my life..
I qualify as the perfect rebound guy.. the escape.. the better than the last..but never good enough..or..maybe too good for you.. and your sister and best friend.. you would rather choose the druggie..the convict..the cheater.the beater...the loser over me.. the wrong wrong guy over me.. I am too good to be hurt..yet I am always hurt.. again and again.
I cannot compete with some.. anymore.. but I am me.
If you have taken the time to know me on different levels.. you may know me as much as I know you.
I always care deeply ..completely..
I did for 17 years..going absolut-ly.. no where..
But I did.. I can..I would..even more for one that would appreciate it..
Yet..I aways find myself.. in this place..
Wondering what I could have or should have..done..
Why am I still alone..because.. I cannot convince.. the worthy one of my intention.. so..I lament...
I am not worthy.. I am not worthy.....
.. been there too many times..
I just do not know why... or how to make it worth all the effort.
Yeah..I can ignite.. I can make the magic fire..
But I am not worthy..I guess..
You know..I am not made of glass..I wont shatter if you drop me..
I crack.. I bruise..
But history shows I don't break.. I never give up.
Sometimes I give in.. but never up..
How long have you known me?.
How much have I been through, that you have seen... am I a ghost??
Did I disappear when it got difficult?
Why do I have to beg to be in your life?.
Yes...it's the beer talking.. I won't remember this.. I will be afraid to say to you.. but.. you already know this. And yet you still push me away... or limit your contact... hoping I will go away.. so I won't make an issue.. .
Is it really an issue.??
Ok.. I need to stop..
Beer..
I wont censor this as I did the last.. there will not be a gap
Filled with ...
I will just end..
R 9/19/17
posted from Bloggeroid
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