I read over my last few posts..
There is stuff buried in my head I forget to share with myself..
It takes a few pints and a blog to shake a lot of it free.
Much of this is known to me..I start out with a thought ..sometimes a topic.. and a couple pints later..I slip deep into my head..and it runs out through my fingers.. sometimes it on topic..sometimes completely out of left field.. always truth..sometimes a stark ..naked me.. here to discover.
It can be surprising to re-read and see what I shared..some secrets I keep just to me..some I keep from me...but what I recognize and do not regret.
It is what it is.. it is real to me.. my truth.. me.
If I am too open..sorry..but not really.. that is why you read this..that is why I shared it with you..
The original reason for this place was a space for me to dump my thoughts..to release the anguish and pain..and hopes and dreams..to help me get to the next day.. it still is just that..all and all.
I have found..that the lack of confidants..drove me to this.. I have a couple that I can share with..now and then..but you..all of you..are always here...as far as I know.. I know we are all alone together..
I share..to help if I can.. maybe you can see similarities. .and maybe it will help you to see another like you..
Maybe not at all..maybe it's just entertainment..
Which is fine too.
I like to talk..because I like it when people listen.. I listen too but not nearly as much as I like.
At this point.. I look back at my topic..
Fortunately it is fairly generic..so. . I can wander away and it won't matter. I hope you don't care..
I have a couple days to my extended weekend.. much needed time away from work.. I spent 12 hours there today.. I have much to get done in the next 2 days.. I'm sure I won't be work free..even though I will be 21 hours away..
I will be driving..much of the time..
Driving is worse than blogging.. my mind wanders..and possibilities ferment..and I do what I do best.. I postulate..all differnet scenarios. .. I work out many possibilities.. I daydream..
Sometimes..I just blank out.. (one of the reasons I love trips) just revel at the scenery..the landscape.. the sky.. part of the reason to drive..anywhere.
Yes...I think about everyone..and everything. My future..where I want to be.. or should be. .
I am not stuck here.....
The one thing about.. beer and blogging.. you rarely know what you are publishing ..you won't remember.. at the time..you know exactly what and why you are typing it..that voice dictating what to say.. is there and very clear.. and you listen.. forget saying too much..forget who you offend or scare..it is what you want to say.. you won't regret it before you press publish. .....
No..somethings are best left in my head..not for public..limited as it is... consumption.. but
As I said way back in the beginning of this blog..
This is me..it is a brain dump of what is swirling around in head..
It keeps me sane..
For those of you that just found this blog.. hello!
For those I told about this blog.. hello...this is me..more than you would want to know.. I hope you can relate..and understand. .
If not.. I am really not sorry.. this is me..the me I do not share with everyone. You should feel privileged. .. no..just kidding.. it is me..
Take it or leave it.
All aside.. thanks for listening to the rantings of a raver..or is it ..ravings of a ranter....
Similar..or different..??
I am .. just me.. I am here..
Alone..not so lonely..yet .. still alone. .
It doesn't make sense ..even to me..
But I am not where I want or need to be.. I have not been for a long time..
(Yeah.. a few pints in.. go ahead..ask me anything. . Naked truth time..)
I really wish someone would ask..anything..it would help define me..
Yet..I will continue to post.. because it helps me..
Better than therapy..
It can be dangerous. . I could reveal a secret and cause you to run for the hills..or it could be a reality..a truth you already know..with confirmation. One you cannot handle..
Then I am alone once more..
The truth in all it's forms..can hurt..and it can 'set you free'..
I am not sure if I want to be set free...or captured.. held close..and never let go..I know that is what I want and need..I need to be....
Lol
If you dont..
really?
Hey! Text me.. I will call you..we will talk...
If you dont.. love you..
No dispute.. I do..
R 8/2/17
There is stuff buried in my head I forget to share with myself..
It takes a few pints and a blog to shake a lot of it free.
Much of this is known to me..I start out with a thought ..sometimes a topic.. and a couple pints later..I slip deep into my head..and it runs out through my fingers.. sometimes it on topic..sometimes completely out of left field.. always truth..sometimes a stark ..naked me.. here to discover.
It can be surprising to re-read and see what I shared..some secrets I keep just to me..some I keep from me...but what I recognize and do not regret.
It is what it is.. it is real to me.. my truth.. me.
If I am too open..sorry..but not really.. that is why you read this..that is why I shared it with you..
The original reason for this place was a space for me to dump my thoughts..to release the anguish and pain..and hopes and dreams..to help me get to the next day.. it still is just that..all and all.
I have found..that the lack of confidants..drove me to this.. I have a couple that I can share with..now and then..but you..all of you..are always here...as far as I know.. I know we are all alone together..
I share..to help if I can.. maybe you can see similarities. .and maybe it will help you to see another like you..
Maybe not at all..maybe it's just entertainment..
Which is fine too.
I like to talk..because I like it when people listen.. I listen too but not nearly as much as I like.
At this point.. I look back at my topic..
Fortunately it is fairly generic..so. . I can wander away and it won't matter. I hope you don't care..
I have a couple days to my extended weekend.. much needed time away from work.. I spent 12 hours there today.. I have much to get done in the next 2 days.. I'm sure I won't be work free..even though I will be 21 hours away..
I will be driving..much of the time..
Driving is worse than blogging.. my mind wanders..and possibilities ferment..and I do what I do best.. I postulate..all differnet scenarios. .. I work out many possibilities.. I daydream..
Sometimes..I just blank out.. (one of the reasons I love trips) just revel at the scenery..the landscape.. the sky.. part of the reason to drive..anywhere.
Yes...I think about everyone..and everything. My future..where I want to be.. or should be. .
I am not stuck here.....
The one thing about.. beer and blogging.. you rarely know what you are publishing ..you won't remember.. at the time..you know exactly what and why you are typing it..that voice dictating what to say.. is there and very clear.. and you listen.. forget saying too much..forget who you offend or scare..it is what you want to say.. you won't regret it before you press publish. .....
No..somethings are best left in my head..not for public..limited as it is... consumption.. but
As I said way back in the beginning of this blog..
This is me..it is a brain dump of what is swirling around in head..
It keeps me sane..
For those of you that just found this blog.. hello!
For those I told about this blog.. hello...this is me..more than you would want to know.. I hope you can relate..and understand. .
If not.. I am really not sorry.. this is me..the me I do not share with everyone. You should feel privileged. .. no..just kidding.. it is me..
Take it or leave it.
All aside.. thanks for listening to the rantings of a raver..or is it ..ravings of a ranter....
Similar..or different..??
I am .. just me.. I am here..
Alone..not so lonely..yet .. still alone. .
It doesn't make sense ..even to me..
But I am not where I want or need to be.. I have not been for a long time..
(Yeah.. a few pints in.. go ahead..ask me anything. . Naked truth time..)
I really wish someone would ask..anything..it would help define me..
Yet..I will continue to post.. because it helps me..
Better than therapy..
It can be dangerous. . I could reveal a secret and cause you to run for the hills..or it could be a reality..a truth you already know..with confirmation. One you cannot handle..
Then I am alone once more..
The truth in all it's forms..can hurt..and it can 'set you free'..
I am not sure if I want to be set free...or captured.. held close..and never let go..I know that is what I want and need..I need to be....
Lol
If you dont..
really?
Hey! Text me.. I will call you..we will talk...
If you dont.. love you..
No dispute.. I do..
R 8/2/17
posted from Bloggeroid
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