car

Ok.. took it in.. for the state inspection.. it failed! ...

One, for the right reverse light..

It dont come with one... Ok ignore that.. 

Two.. the emergency hazards dont work...turns out.. the module i replaced had a bent pin in the connector.. i tried to straighten it..it broke... So I repaired it.. all good..but too late to reinspect today..wait till Monday..

Getting closer to a viable spare car.

Almost a year after i bought it.

...

Ok.. so im working last night.. 

I get a call over messenger..

The ex-wife.. she is distressed..

Needed someone to talk to..

I win.. 

Her other, has been gone.. a week or so..no contact.. I figure a repeat of past events.. I let her talk/vent ..

I think it is what she needs.. an ear.. 

Eventually she realizes im at work and ends the call. 

I hope she is ok..and it works out..

..really.. nothing I can do but listen.

..

Limited contact..as usual..

A few morning msgs.. and some limited back and forth..but not much.

Im zoned..i guess.. 

The trip is coming fast.. options for planes are going away.. 

Ive heard nothing about the 4th.. so that is probably a bust..

Her sister went to Machu Pichu.. so she didnt do that.. too busy with work and farm.. 

Too bad.  For us...

I wish it was more of a relationship..

But its just a friendship..

As it has been for years..

I am in love..

But that is totally on me.

...

I really thought I stopped getting so attached.. I thought I could .. just be uncomitted .. but ..the old training..to be one minded and to find the one you want to be with.. with the hope that they want to be with you too...

If not.. you can or bottle that emotion and walk away.

Deal with the hurt and rejection..or just the onesided attraction.. and move on..as you have done  ovwr and over.. 

I have had little success being the dog..that just looks for my own.. and moves along.. I have always needed to feel something.. beyond lust.. 

Which is why I am still with out..I guess. 

...

I will have my road trip..places to see that I have never been.. and places I have always wanted to go.. and ..no one to share it with..

Just my mind.. and memories..

...

R