Mid December

Things are settling in. Spent the day emptying and moving boxes.
Found a closer grocery store. Looked for a cable i am sure i have..somewhere..  still looking.
Did my weekend chores..
Just decided to eat and listen to tv.
Not much else going on.
My Monday will be cut short..i start the 3A shift on Tuesday. I did one on Friday..simple shift swap..but.. this week it will be all week. Then a Sat  coverage. Then again next week.
Sometimes it sucks being the new guy.
We still have the company sale pending.. and all the changes it will cause. Just have to hope i will still be employed when it settles.

Yet. I have a home..and it is out of town. I have lived the last 17 years in the middle of one of the busy areas.. close to work.. now..i am out in the woods.. i have to drive to everything. Nothing is close by..
Just L and I at home.. never much on tv.. there is still stuff to do..
Set up and arrange..
I cleared out the kitchen.. gonna setup the bar stools and figure out the dining area and bookshelves that will clear out the last of the boxes in the dining room.
Still need bedroom furniture.. a desk and night stands..
That is it for the house..
I need to pickup the engine..and start on the car..
I could start taking it apart.. since its just sitting in the garage.

The rest of my life is just bland. No one and nothing.
I am sure i have alienated anyone that used to be in my life.
Timing and perceptions have made me someone to avoid.
I tried to keep in touch.. but now.. Nothing.
Nobody.
No family..no friends.. not meeting anybody new..
Just work..home..sleep..work..repeat.
I still have.. plenty to do at home.. plenty to do at work..
We can drive.. and shop.. and go out to eat..
I have..to finish some tasks..and survive the winter..
Lets see..

I have been alone.
I have survived..
I am lonely..i have been lonely..i will be again..
I dont find situations that last..
I did survive 20 yrs in a situation..but it was so limited..
Work..home..work.. but someone to come home to..
Someone to be with L.
Now..it is just me.

I somehow..have isolated me from everything.

I just dont know..
What is next..

R
12/16/18