Ok, still confused.
Still hurt.
Still alone.
Time invested, and wasted..I guess.
I couldn't make the cut.. like the commercial.. your boring. Boring.
It wasn't said, but its how I feel.
Then as I creep up on another b-day.. that no one will acknowledge... or care about.. just getting old... grey and less ..
Nothing I can do about all that.. been living with that for so long..not gonna change..
Got to make plans to get out and not come back... go where I can be me and not everything I have become.
The time is coming..
R
11/01/12 10:18p
More..
ReplyDeleteJust don't understand.
Were you trying to see if we were ok?
Was it uncomfortable for you?
It was at first for me, but I was good, being a friend like before.
I'm not saying it didn't hurt.. but id rather be your friend, and see you than not.
But, if tonight was a test.. I guess I failed... was I supposed to wear my heart on my sleeve?
Not happening in public, it does noone any good.
I want to talk to you about all this. But I guess enough time has not passed. You still care too much, and are not ready.
Well, I miss you, I miss the short texts.. and everything else.
I wish this to get better.. time can be my friend and my enemy..
Unfortunately its time that I must rely on to tell me.
Oh well, hope I can sleep,
R
11/01/12 1:23AM