Busy

I am keeping myself busy. Not sleeping well. Not feeling 100%. Struggling through the work day.. sore.. tired.. generally grumpy ... somethings dont change. But some are a decision to be made.. some are a red flag.. one I cannot ignore.. I am restless. I need something. ... or someone to occupy my mind ... and eat my time .. and help me so i dont have to think about work...

I got call a few days ago.. played phone tag till today.. and the guy..basically was fishing for an engineer. Said to send him my resume.. he knows the purchase is happening.. and is looking far a few placemnts... Minneapolis and Dallas.. its a FOX owned station..and probably a really good job.... hmmm...

That aside.. the roomates will be moving out in 10 days.. and it will be just me and L. And the cat.. he will be unbearable. But we will see.

I don't think I want to think too much about what is coming.. it could be good or not.. I'm spending too much time alone and in the bar..
But don't have much else...

Well got to keep on..

R 10/15/13

By the fire

Here I am by the fire, watching it burn.. enjoying the heat.
I am alone.. yes.. just me.
I am thinking of a name for my companion...
ABbie S Lout..
Something like that..

The big logs have burned out and I'm feeding it with twigs and other scrap.. but I should let it die and go in ... got stuff to finish before lights out.. and the new week begins.. and my drink is empty..

Changes are coming.. work.. home... I should welcome them.. and maybe take one last road trip.. can't afford it.. but will just loose 3 days paid.. and show nothing for it..

End of the month will be here soon and the home changes are then.. what to do.. maybe a staycation to clean the house up..
Hmmm sounds like work... lol

Well the fire is out and I will stir the coals and put the lid on and cleanup and go in.

R 10/6/13

ISTBA. But good to be able to see people you know

Yes, another saturday out , by myself.
Kinda lonely but 'sharing the drink they call loneliness'
Its ok.
I could be home alone and bored..
I could be stuck in front of the TV.. vegetating...
But lately. TV don't interest me.. and it rarely sucks me in.. but I do need to get a better option..
Someone to demand my attention.. and deserve it .

I am still me.. I still help those I cared for.. I am not asking anythng for it.. it is just me caring for another human .. one I know.. that is the way it should be.. we should care for the people In our lives.. even if we are not In theirs anymore.. we touch people and they touch us.. that is reason enough to help when they need it.. if you can.. no obligation except normal human kindness. .if you have any history.. good bad or otherwise. You should be able to put differences aside.. and help someone you once cared for.. the world would be a better place if everyone realized this . There would be no need for soup kitchens or homeless shelters.. no need for the guy on the corner with the cardboard sign..
I know it used to be that way.. back in my granny's time.. people looked out for each other.. and took care of people they knew..

Anyway.. don't judge me for helping people in my past.. take a minute and realize.. one day it could be you... or me..
I would hope someone would be there for me.. if ever I needed it..

Got to look at what's coming . The end of the year... lots to do and figure out.. I don't think the current situation is getting me anywhere. Kinda stagnant.. got to move forward.. and begin new.. or pickup where I left off...

ISTBA..

Story of my life..
Someone needs to belp me change that...

R 10/05/13

Didn't work.. nobody missed me.

Well, I stayed off and then only was on once a day..then only a couple..but mostly private comments. And a blank profile pic.
Got a few concerrned comments but not much..
Everyone knows I am not gonna shut it off.

I did send a smiley and it took 3 days to get a smiley back..
At least I got a response .. better than the last 4 months.

No matter.. I can't keep this up.. got to make a change..
Just not sure what I should be doing.
The roomates move out at the end of the month. Just me and L living with the cat.. it is actually his house.. he's there all day and every night.. if he had ajob I'm sure he'd kick us all out...

Got to use some time.. got month maybe..to use 20 hrs, but don't know what or where to use it.. maybe a drive.. just me.. plus I have a week or so of vacation left and all my sick time... I should do it now while L has transport...

Hmmm.. what to do.. where to go..who to see..
Got to plan this out.. and just do it.

R 10/3/13