Well.. it's final. September has come... Nothing has really changed.. the past 6 yrs.. just like before.. now I have the document that proves it. I still don't know how to begin, or continue.. I want someone who will understand, but with that comes baggage, theirs, ours, and mine. I don't think I can endure that. although starting with someone new is tough, almost impossible, my eyes deceive me, my mind slaps me into reality, and my conscience corrects me. and I end up alone. It's a little hard seeing how easily others can move on, even if it isn't exactly right, but it's not for me to say. that is the way it was and I guess the way it will be.. R